Have you ever prayed so hard for something you really wanted, but not gotten it? Maybe your Dad was dying or you really wanted that guy in high school to notice you. Not getting what you pray for seems like God doesn’t care. Is that actually the truth?
Pray Continuously
Scripture has many Bible verses that tell us to pray continually or to ask God for everything. Prayer should be like a conversation with our father. Matthew 6:7-8 tells us that we don’t need to babble “like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you need it.” Romans 8:26 says that when we don’t know what to pray for the Holy Spirit will translate our prayer to God.
So Why Don’t We Get What We Pray for?
Jesus says on the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) to ask and we’ll get what we ask for. It’s pretty clear what he says here. Matthew 6:25-34 says that God will provide everything we need. This section includes Bible verses about how well God provides for birds and beautiful flowers. Those things are much less important than God’s children, so surely we will be provided for as well. So why don’t we get exactly what we pray for?
Directly after the famous ask seek knock Bible verse, Jesus says that God gives good gifts. Like a human father gives his children what they need, God provides His children with what they need. It just isn’t always what they ask for.
Bad Gifts
I’m reminded or the Garth Brooks song “unanswered prayers”. The story is that he prayed every night that the hot girl in high school would be his girlfriend and it never happened. Years later, he met that girl again and she had changed. Meanwhile he was happily married to a woman he never would’ve met if he had married in high school. The refrain is “some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.”
Another example that comes to mind is from the television show “Leverage.” In the second episode of the fourth season, they walk past a spoiled rich woman talking to her father’s secretary. She had gotten in a car accident, again, and was having problems with the cops. “Daddy needs to fix,” she says before walking off and getting in another expensive car her father owns. A girl like that is used to getting everything provided for her the moment she asks for it, no matter what she asked for. Almost everyone agrees that spoiling a child to that degree turns them into a bad person that no one wants to spend time with.
James 4:3 reminds us that not everything we ask for or seek is good for us. God knows what we need and want. He knows what getting what we ask for will do to us. He knows that getting the dream job we ask for may distort our values and make us unfulfilled, but the job he’s giving us next month will make us happier and introduce us to our spouse. Going back to the earlier example, God may not have healed our dad because he would be in continuous pain for the rest of his life. It may have been better for him and the family for him to go to heaven at that moment. Maybe we never married that dream guy in high school so we could become who we needed to be to settle down with the actual perfect soulmate for us after college or in our forties.
God’s plan is amazing. Looking back on your life, I bet you can see how what you did before led you to where you are now. If you had made different choices, you would be a very different person. God knows that. His answer might seem like “no”, but it is probably “wait until I show you what’s coming! You’re going to love it!”
So Why Do We Pray?
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
God knows what we need even if we don’t say the right words, so what is the point in praying? The Bible tells us to pray continually, but God doesn’t need prayers to know what we need. That means that praying is for our benefit. Praying to God is a reminder to us that God is in control and we don’t need to worry. It’s also a reminder that God is still there. Think about good parents when their kids move out to start their own houses. Parents still want to get calls or letters from children even when they aren’t in the same house anymore. Children need their parents advice and comfort throughout their lives. Most adults know they should maintain earthly family relationships, so why do they not maintain a relationship with their Heavenly Father?
There is also examples in modern life and the Bible that prayer changes things. There are examples of Jesus saying that He wouldn’t heal someone, and that person changing His mind. (Matthew 15:21-28 is one example) Jesus says in Luke 18:1-8 that persistent prayer can change God’s mind. This is a concept that I struggle to understand, so I don’t know how to explain it, but I know it is true, because God says it is true. There are many things that God says that I don’t understand with my human mind. My lack of understanding does not change God’s truth so I’m including it in this post.
How To Pray Constantly In Modern Life
Prayer does have power to change things. So pray daily, all day long if you can. You don’t need to be sitting with your hands folded and eyes closed all day. Keeping a one sided conversation with God in your head most of the day is also “praying continually.” Prayer is a conversation with God, not just a stream of requests for God.
